956 replies to this topic

[SandSpider]

The blueberry fire brigade come and put out your blueberries. Unfortunately they use sulphuric acid to do it with, as sulphuric acid is the only thing that can put out flaming blueberries. In doing so, they melt you in a similar way to that bit in Raiders of the Lost Ark. You know, the bit where the fuzzy bunny looks at the Ark of the Covenant thing and starts to melt. That was good bit, that was.

I wish that my hovercraft was full of eels.

[Teljaxx]

You sail your eel laden hovercraft to Madagascar, where it is illegal to transport eels using an amphibious vehicle. You get arrested, and fed to lemurs.

Orange juice is tasty, I wish it was not.

[thedark20]

Your orange juice isn't tasty, but it's actually pee.

I wish my pee glows

[SparkyJJC]

Granted: Your pee glows, but that's because it's radioactive and it burns you.

I wish I had the power of electrokinesis.

Edited by SparkyJJC, March 16 2014 - 07:32 AM.

[Sapp]

Granted. But your power requires that you use yourself as a conduit and it still hurts like hell.

I wish that I could get some work done.

(Edit: originally said "I wish you would not grant me this wish", but figured it might go against the rules :S )

Edited by Sapp, March 24 2014 - 05:45 AM.

[hoghead]

Ok, granted but you make your mother do it.  I wish I'd get this posted before McBonY  posts! HA!!!!!

Edited by hoghead, March 24 2014 - 05:55 AM.

[EM1O]

You DID get it posted before McBonY posted, but you got your post upstaged by my awesomer avatar and stupendous signature banner!

I wish I had a Metal-flake red Dodge Charger

[Coboxite]

Granted, but its a tiny model car and has gold plastic syndrome.

I wish I had an infinite source of Garolite.

[SandSpider]

Granted, you now have an infinite supply of Garolite. Unfortunately though, you don't have any food so you end up having to eat the garolite, which is toxic, and slowly poison yourself.

I wish rain was strawberry flavoured.

[Teljaxx]

All water in the universe has turned into strawberry milkshakes. While delicious, this causes very bad things to happen.

I wish sat voolak nee kred, fad zee fong.

[hoghead]

Granted  but it was unfortunate that the guy who read your post could only guess at the first, second, and last words an could only assume you were sitting in  alcohol flavored Chinese food.    I wish I wasn't so dumb.

[Teljaxx]

You now know 17 new words, but never get the chance to use them.

I wish Alligators and Crocodiles were even harder to tell apart.

Edited by Teljaxx, March 25 2014 - 03:11 PM.

[Coboxite]

Granted, they're all nachos now.

I wish for a MSIB G1 FortMax.

Edited by Coboxite, March 25 2014 - 09:23 PM.

[EM1O]

Granted, but box has been opened, it's actually a Beast, and your little sister chewed one Leg off.

I wish I didn't get the Huevos Rancheros farts (so does my wife)...

[hoghead]

Granted you and your wife ate so much Huevos Rancheros that you two have to fuzzy bunny in colostomy bags the rest of your life.   Wish I was an astronaut .    (p00p fuzzy bunny) Didn't want you to think I was to rude.

Edited by hoghead, March 29 2014 - 11:22 PM.

[RoughRide]

You got to be an astronaut, but your shuttle blew up and you and your partner were sent hurling into space with no up or down or left or right.
(Dunno if this reference is at all correct)

I wish I were a supreme overlord ruler of everything.

[Teljaxx]

The entirety of the multiverse rebels against your totalitarian rule, and throws you outside of time and space.

I wish music was more flower scented when it was green.