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personal 1 on 1 training from THEEEE hestoned

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#1
hestoned

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hello new and old players.

do you want to get gud at hawken? lol of course you do. from the generosity of my heart i have decided that i will train anyone willing to learn from one of the best players to have ever touched(LOL) A MECH IN THIS GAME!!!!

my credentials::

i have been playing this game since 2011 when ALPHA 2 was available to the select few the gods deemed worthy.

when i enter a server people question their faith in a deity and thank me for the privilege of being in my presence. those that question my authority i like to entertain with false security. firstly i ALLOW them to damage me with primary and secondary fire. once this is done i pull out what i like to call "the hestoned" and utterly decimate my "oponent"(LOL) to the point where they have no choice but to acknowledge my superiority with the traditional "gf".(GOOD FIGHT)

 

MY TEAM (OMNI) IS WITHOUT QUESTION THE BEST TEAM TO EVER COMP HAWKEN

in closing:

if you want to get gud at this game then add me on my account here at the website and PM me for training. if i deem you worthy to receive my 5+ years of INCOMPREHENSIBLE knowledge of (MOTHER) hawken then i will allow you to hear my voice in your teamspaek of choice (VOIP NO REQUIRED, IN GAME IS FINE)

i have added a visual art for you to (PERHAPS?) understand your potential for undergoing my training

 

HdYew3v.jpg


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#2
Heartsong

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Go home, hestoned, you're drunk.


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#3
CounterlogicMan

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Noob.


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#4
OdinTheWise

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if you want to play hawken, just say so


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#5
Arkhaun

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sounds like these 1v1 will be comprised of him cycling through which lights teach hardest lessons in buggery and maybe a bit of incini or van to poundout the "THIS IS THE HEAVY" no-brainers


SORRY CAPS

 

 

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#6
Amidatelion

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Isn't this hestoned dude a Smash player?
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#7
WmMoneyFrmMissouri

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I nominate harmless_kittens to be the first disciple of THE PROGRAM. He will forever be known hence as RABID_PUNCHUINTHEDICK_KITTENS.
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#8
Merl61

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I will destroy you. But SRS I'd take you up on this. Be happy to learn from the best:)

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#9
WmMoneyFrmMissouri

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^stop wasting heston's time. You're already good enough merl.

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#10
Shade__

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^stop wasting heston's time. You're already good enough merl.


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#11
ticklemyiguana

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I am only good because for some months after every War Wednesday, which hestoned dutifully attended to my great appreciation, he and I would duel for an hour or so, and he would give me pointers and practically never tire of wiping the floor with me.

If you have any desire to play any level of competitive or any interest in getting better at Hawken, hestoned is the fuzzy bunnyng man.











































All of these returns are so that you look at this post instead of the above silliness.
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#12
Onstrava

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I would love training senpai. I don't suppose you know how to train someone with the G2R. gjn81wvxqsq6yzcwubok.png


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#13
Merl61

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^stop wasting heston's time. You're already good enough merl.

That's quitters talk.


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#14
crockrocket

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Make SSSDM great again. We don't need your training, just your attendance. 


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#15
Guns_N_Rozer

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Scurb 



#16
coldform

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HdYew3v.jpg

 

that kid on the left lol - even IRL walls OPAF

 


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I like going against the best of any game I play. Helps you in the long run n motivates u to do more. Always room for improvement not failure

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FIRST OFF WHAT THE FUZZ IS A "SHILL"


#17
DallasCreeper

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Go home, hestoned, you're drunk.

I think he stoned. 

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#18
harmless_kittens

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Was playing a 3 Star (for me) TDM match just last night, and then "Hestoned" joined us.  I asked Scrimbot what our MMR range was, and it came back as 1050-3000!  Now c'mon, that's got to be a record.  Care to guess which side won?

 

:(



#19
TheButtSatisfier

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Was playing a 3 Star (for me) TDM match just last night, and then "Hestoned" joined us.  I asked Scrimbot what our MMR range was, and it came back as 1050-3000!  Now c'mon, that's got to be a record.  Care to guess which side won?

 

:(

 

You spelled "Hestoned, thank you for being so generous! Please train my son and I" wrong


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#20
harmless_kittens

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You spelled "Hestoned, thank you for being so generous! Please train my son and I" wrong

 

Sorry, let me rephrase.  "Thank you for the offer, but I ALREADY realize that I'm pathetic."



#21
Amidatelion

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Sorry, let me rephrase.  "Thank you for the offer, but I ALREADY realize that I'm pathetic."

You're not pathetic! You're learning!


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#22
DallasCreeper

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Sorry, let me rephrase.  "Thank you for the offer, but I ALREADY realize that I'm pathetic."

Everyone was pathetic at one point, even hestoned. 


 

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#23
MomOw

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An expert is not necessarily a good teacher, and the teacher has to adapt to his audience.

So, are 1337 PL4Y3RS also 1337 T34CH3RS ?

 

Side note : dafuq my job brainwashed me...


Edited by (KDR) MomOw, 02 May 2016 - 06:41 AM.

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#24
coldform

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Was playing a 3 Star (for me) TDM match just last night, and then "Hestoned" joined us. I asked Scrimbot what our MMR range was, and it came back as 1050-3000! Now c'mon, that's got to be a record. Care to guess which side won?

:(

Well, he's up there...
http://home.xshade.c...rs/leaderboard/

Btw, if hestoned just takes the time to put stuff in writing that's compehensible, he'll be a good teacher. No doubt he will have no problem taking time to demonstrate his written points, and demonstrate them well.

I like going against the best of any game I play. Helps you in the long run n motivates u to do more. Always room for improvement not failure

z6aJAX7.png?1

 

czerofive-Today at 2:22 AM > got banned from playing lazertag - I used a knife to conserve ammo

FIRST OFF WHAT THE FUZZ IS A "SHILL"


#25
OdinTheWise

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You're not pathetic! You're learning!


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#26
Hyginos

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#27
TheButtSatisfier

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Sorry, let me rephrase.  "Thank you for the offer, but I ALREADY realize that I'm pathetic."

 

I don't get it. Do you plan to be pathetic forever?


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#28
harmless_kittens

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I don't get it. Do you plan to be pathetic forever?

 

Meh, maybe - I really don't care.  I'm just not invested/interested enough to make a serious effort at improving.  I play it to have fun, not improve my skills.  If I can get better at the same time, that's great (and I guess I am technically better now than when I started).  But the idea of working 8 or more hours a day, and then coming home to "go to school" in Hawken is personally not appealing to me.  Ambition (at least in this life) has never been one of my driving impulses.  This is, after all, just a game.  Not trying to offend anyone - just 'sayin how I see it from my perspective.


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#29
hellc9943

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#30
CraftyDus

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context ye bads

 

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#31
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#32
TheButtSatisfier

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I play it to have fun, not improve my skills. 

 

There's definitely nothing wrong with playing the game to have fun.

 

For context, a lot of us consider (1) playing for enjoyment and (2) improving our skills to both be fun. In fact, I've found that when I became more skilled that I began to have more fun playing Hawken, and that was before I was actually practicing some skills like I have been recently.

 

In regards to Hestoned's offer: this probably goes without saying, but like practicing for any other activity, you'd be investing a small portion of not-fun activities so that you have more fun when you do those activities "for real". Hestoned may be able to give you enough pointers in 30 minutes to give you a respectable leg up than you would have otherwise had to learn for yourself over 50 hours of pubbing.

 

Food for thought. I'll still love you no matter what your decision is.


Edited by TheButtSatisfier, 02 May 2016 - 01:18 PM.

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#33
harmless_kittens

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No, I suspect he'd get impatient with me when I can't, or won't, perform as intended.  I went through one of these 30-45 minute training sessions already with another player, and realized it was not for me.  I've said it before, but I am NOT going to wear my fingers numb with all the twitching, jerking, dodging, flying stuff - just ain't gonna happen.  I respect that you guys can do that.  But it's not fun for me.  Thanks for loving and welcoming me regardless though :)  (Despite my refusal to move that way, there are some matches where I break into 2nd or 3rd place now, so there is evidence of progress - just slow progress.)


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#34
DemitronPrime

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Im not good harmless. but I had fun playing with you the other night man, so you cant be that bad ;)

 

JS man,

 

I mean of cause some elitist prick will say " oh yeah man have fun but you can be better "

 

in the end man, its YOUR game time, spend it how you wanna :P


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#35
SS396

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Someones got ?


[DELETED]

 

fuzzy bunny you CZeroFive 


#36
lo_spaghetto

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how about make a video


Edited by lo_spaghetto, 02 May 2016 - 10:11 PM.

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#37
Onebullit

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how about make a video

You can't farm MMR by making a video.


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#38
Flifang

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I might take you up on this offer at some point now that I've got a steady income and finals are done. Although because I live in Alaska my available hours will be a few hours off from yours but I feel that can be managed. My biggest issue in my opinion is bad engagement habits. Been trying to kill them off but I eventually revert to my yoloing habits after a game or two.



#39
KuyaJun

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Yo Hestoned! I'd love to do a few sessions. Would be fun. But I've been out of country. Went back last week and sucked ass.

I'll be back next month. Hopefully for a bit. Was home for last week. Didn't see you in game.. Prolly cus my MMR tanked when I got back for that short while.

Anyways if your offer still stands when I get back would be great.

Prime! Good to see you still play.

Laters all!
KuyaJun

#40
XPloyt

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  I've said it before, but I am NOT going to wear my fingers numb with all the twitching, jerking, dodging, flying stuff - just ain't gonna happen.  I respect that you guys can do that.  But it's not fun for me.

 

Foot pedals. Because, why not?






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